SouthPark Slaves
by Darkslayer18
Summary: What if Stan and kyle had become cartmans slaves? an alt-ending to red badge of gayness.StanXKyle Style ftw rated M just in case Completed
1. Twinkies and Breakups

South Park Red Badge of Gayness Alt-ending

Chp. 1

Disclaimer- I do not own Stan Kyle Cartman or any other south park characters that appear here they all belong to Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

What if Cartman had won? What would he have made stan and kyle suffer.

It had been a week since Cartman had succeeded in getting the president to admit the south won while they didn't get to become their own country it didn't matter.

Cartman had won.

Stan and Kyle had been dreading the hell they knew was coming they were Cartmans slaves and who knows what he'd do if they tried to back out. But Cartman hadn't so much as mentioned it to them and they were starting to worry what he might be cooking up.

They were walking towards shakeys pizza when they saw Cartman smirking by the front asked "What do you think fat-ass is gonna tell us to do?" Stan replied in a laughing tone "Probably ask us to go get him some tasty cakes so he can shove them into that fat fucking mouth of his." As they approached Cartman pulled out a list. "Well you gahs I have some tasks for the both of you I hope you've been enjoing the extra time I've let you have I just have been busy planing and plotting…"

The way he said it told them he didn't care if hey knew something bad was coming infact he wanted them to know…and to realise they couldn't escape.

"Now onto your tasks!" shaking stan and kyle from their respective thoughts. "Kahl your first task is to use your jewish money for a good purpose go get me some twinkies!" Both stan and kyle had to fight themselves to stop from giggling as stans prediction came true. Cartman either didn't notice or didn't care "Stan…dump Wendy." Stan turned white as a sheet.

"W-what? Come on!" stan nearly shouted.

"You heard me dump her unless you wanna back out of your agreement in which case you will be the laughing stock of the world within 24 hours and then kahl here will have to suck my bahls!." Kyle just glared but some part of him wanted to thank Cartman for making stan dump wendy he hated that bitch all she did was make stan feel bad about himself.

Stan reluctantly replied "Fine I'll do it…" putting his head down he went into shakeys pizza to find Wendy since she said she'd be there if he got bored…(which of course he didn't tell kyle who got mad whenever she was mentioned) Stan really liked the girl at least he thought he did but either way theres no way he was gonna abandon kyle like that cause he knew kyle would never back out of a deal with Cartman and give him more material to use against Jews.

"Hey Stan!" Wendy cheerily said as she walked up to him.

"Hey wendy we need to talk…" Stan said slow and quietly.

Wendy suddenly froze face turning red with anger. How did that girl know what he was gonna say before he said it?

"How dare you break up with me! You bastard! I hate you!" and with that she ran off. And then stan thought wait a minute…didn't she allways break up with him? He never once freaked out like that…and at least he had the decency to tell her himself instead of sending kyle or something…maybe he didn't really want to be with her after all…

As he walked back out a defiant smile on his face stan said "There fat-ass I broke up with her and rumors about me are probably already spreading…wheres kyle?"

Cartman currently sitting on the curb writing something while stuffing his face with a slice of pizza. "Huh oh good job go get me a soda…" Stan getting slightly pissed at the lack of attention he was being paid "I asked you where kyle was fat-ass now tell me" Cartman looked over like he had just noticed stan was there "Jesus don't get your panties in a bunch I sent your boyfriend to get the twinkas cause I was hungra now respect my fucking authorita and get me a soda!"

Stan had to seriously restrain himself from killing Cartman right there because if he did he'd be sent to juvi or some mental hospital and that would mean no kyle time…wait kyle time? Wouldn't umm being confined be the bad part of being confined? Not missing your boy-er bestfriend…god damn it Cartman was gonna pay.

At the grocery store.

Kyle was standing in line waiting to pay for fat-asses twinkies with his own god damn money but for some reason he was happy. Why? Because stan had chosen to dump that bitch instead of aandoning kyle to Cartmans fucking sadistic nature. He wanted to gloat in her face haha he chose me bitch! Hes mine!...wait he didn't belong to kyle…well sort of…they were just super best friends…right? He was shaken from his thoughts by the cashier. "That will be 3.50 please." He stuttered as he handed the cashier the money "h-here you g-go" and in his head all he thought was god damn it I sound like butters…

When kyle finally returned he found stan sittin shivering on the curb while cartman sat on his jacket.

"uh stan dude why arent you wearing your jacket?" Kyle asked throwing the twinkies at Cartman.

"Fat Ass said his ass was getting sore which isnt a surprise considering the weight its gotta put up with everyday…"

"Ay! Respect my fucking authorita! You guys are mah slaves and as such you will treat mah with respect!" Cartman yelled in his stupid forced accent voice.

"Oh yes master!" both stan and kyle replied in a heavily sarcastic laughing tone.

"Fine you guys don't get to hang out or even talk to each other for 2 days!" Cartman smirked.

Both boys stopped instantly two days wasn't a long time but when was the last time they hadnt seen each other for that long? Even when they were sick they'd still sneak over and hang out and when they were grounded they at least they saw each other in school.

"Come on Cartman we're sorry we didn't mean anything by it!" Stan said quickly trying to appease the hitler reincarnate.

"Yea Fa-err Cartman it might affect our scheduels as slaves if you separate us" Kyle added.

That was a good idea kyle had if Cartman thought it would benefit to have them both together then nothing would stop him stan thought way to go kyle! He was always the smartest in class so it shouldn't surprise him but it still often did.

"Hmm the jew makes a good point fine but you two are still gonna pay for anymore disrespect towards mah!" And with that he turned and shuffled home throwing the empty twinkie container in the trash.

What a fat-ass…


	2. Random calls and Awkward moments

Chp. 2

Disclaimer- yea still don't own south park sooo yea…don't sue me pls thanks

It had been two days since they'd heard from Cartman he'd called to have them clean his room but other than that they thought this was fairly easy considering who they'd lost to. They were laying around in Stan's room bored Stan was sitting against his door while Kyle was laying on the bed on his side towards Stan.

"So what do you think he's planning?" Kyle asked lazily.

"Don know but knowing him it's gonna be horrible…" Stan replied.

"Well he can't make us hurt ourselves or others unless they harm him first at least so we should be safe from physical harm…I think…"

"True but what could he be planning that would make him waste even one second of having us as slaves I mean you know how much he-" but Stan was cut off as the phone began to ring.

"I'm not getting it…"Lazily once again even though the phone was on the table next to the bed.

"Lazy ass…" Stan muttered.

"What is it with my ass anyway?" turning over "I mean is it really all that great? The girls wont leave me alone about it."

Stan picked up the phone looking over at Kyle's backside hardly aware that someone's voice was coming through the phone. "Uh Stan?…what are you looking at?" Kyle looked at him confused.

"N-nothing! Nothing at all Kyle…" He suddenly realized there was a voice shouting at him through the phone and not one he wanted to hear.

"What do you want fa-Cartman?" Catching the insult just barely hoping fat-ass hadn't noticed.

"…I just wanted to call and tell you both that mah plotting is reaching a level previously thought un-reachable! Oh and that I completely and utterly hate you guys with every muscle in my being I hate you guys." And with that he hung up leaving Stan with the urge to tell him it would have meant more if he'd said every pound of fat in his body.

"What did fat ass want?" Kyle asked while propping himself up on his elbow.

"He just wanted to say he hated us…" Stan trailed of distracted again.

"Uh Stan? Your staring again…is there something on my ass?" Kyle began twisting to look at his backside. "I can't see it could you get it?"

Stan thinking quickly he had to pretend there was something otherwise his staring would seem weird…plus he'd get to grab Kyle's…WOAH where did that come from how was that a plus? He couldn't stall anymore.

"Uh yea sure Ky hang on" reaching down and gently feeling the other boys rear for just a moment or at least that's what he meant.

"Is it stuck or something…?" Kyle asked little shaky and face turning red.

"Oh uh no I got it…just making sure that's all there was…" Stan recoiled his hand quickly and sat against his far wall hoping Kyle couldn't see the red on his face from his position on the bed.

"Sooo…I guess I'll see you at school tomorrow right?" Kyle asked jumping towards the door not waiting for a response.

"Uh yea…" Stan whispered in reply what was going on with him? He was pretty sure a straight boy shouldn't be feeling urges to look at his super best friends back side and even more he DEFINITLY shouldn't want to feel it and he was pretty sure Kyle had put two and two together after all he was the smartest in class…Damn it…

Kyle had run down the stairs and out the door but had frozen when he got outside. Had he imagined it? Stan had been staring at him but not in a way that guys normally would and why was his own heart beat speeding up when he considered the possibility Stan might like him? God and he'd just run out of his super best friends room in a "I know you just felt up my ass and you liked it" kinda way what if Kyle had hurt his feelings? God how was he gonna talk to him tomorrow…fuck…

Tomorrow was gonna be awkward…


	3. Lunches and Homosexuality

Chp 3

Disclaimer- STILL don't own any of the south park characters cause if I did I'd pay someone to do this for me…anyway on with the story…don't sue me

So it was Monday just about lunch time and Kyle and Stan hadn't really talked other than to say "Hey…" or "I hate school…" nah there wasn't any awkward tension between them. Stan had just been staring at Kyle's ass like it was the holy grail and Kyle had just enjoyed being felt up by said staring boy…that wasn't weird was it?

"So you gah I was thinking you two are gonna do mah project for mah oh and I waited till the last minute so it's due tomorrow don't screw it up ok kahl? I know you were thinking about failing on purpose you self serving Jew but you and your boyfriend there better get mah an A!" And with that the fat sadistic boy began stuffing his face with his own food and grabbing some food off his neighbors trays when they weren't looking.

"So a project for the fat-ass huh…?" Kyle whispered to Stan who was looking the other way.

"uh yea I guess so…umm where do you wanna do it?" Stan asked looking at Kyle.

"Do it?! Do what?" Kyle asked suddenly freaking out.

"Umm the project…?" Stan asked wondering what had freaked Kyle out.

"Oh yea that the one from Mr. Garrison Right? Finished mine on counter culture last night…" Kyle said.

"Yea I'm done too cause I got pop culture it was a piece of cake." Stan laughed.

" Yea but it's bull crap kids in other towns don't have to do topics like this I mean we're only in the 4th grade and he treats us like we're in highschool!" Kyle said angrily.

"What are you so mad about? You're the only one of us that can actually handle the work the rest of us mortals don't have an intellect the size of Cartman's appitite!" They laughed.

And just like that the awkwardness was gone…until…

"So what topic did Cartman get anyway?" Kyle asked looking at the paper the fat one had given them.

They both froze when they saw it. Of course that would be the one topic the fat-ass sadistic son of a bitch would get assigned and then pass onto them. Of course it would be…

Homosexuality…Fuck…

Chapters are short I know but if I make them long I ramble…oh and if you noticed a lot of … good cause I like doing that…so yea…deal…with ….it…haha tell me what you think I know it sucks but at least I'll know you tried it haha XD


	4. Wrestling and Realization

Chp 4

Disclaimer- yup I don't own south park still so enjoy…

So here they were Thursday at 6 pm in Stan's room right where "it" had happened where Stan had grabbed his friends ass and both though unsaid both of them knew they liked it. Course because they hadn't talked about it neither knew what the other might be thinking. And so the awkward silence had gone on for several minutes as they got ready to do Cartman's project on the worst topic possible for the situation…

Homosexuality…

They were super best friends right? This shouldn't be a big deal they had made jokes about being gay before right? Well that was obviously before they both had doubts about themselves and each other…

"Sooo fat-ass got stuck with homosexuality huh?" Stan stated trying to easy the silence.

"No I believe_**we**_got stuck with homosexuality…" Kyle answered without thinking.

"W-what!?" Stan jumped thinking Kyle was accusing him but wait why did he care he wasn't gay right?

"Oh uh well we have to do the project that's what I meant…" Kyle stuttered quickly while blushing slightly after realizing what he'd said.

"Oh yea I knew that…sooo you want to do the report and I'll just do the poster?" Stan asked feeling stupid for missing Kyle's meaning earlier.

"Sure your more artistic and stuff anyway." Turning to work on Stan's computer.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Stan was getting angry now.

"Well your just a more emotional person is all ya know more caring…" Kyle said not noticing Stan's anger.

"I'm emotional? What are you calling me gay now?!" Stan yelled at Kyle spinning the other boys chair around to face him.

"Stan! That that's not what I meant I just meant that your good at art…" Kyle looked down to to side after noticing that Stan was barely 5 inches from his face.

"Ky look at me! What is up with you lately you won't look me straight in the face anymore!" Stan said even though he was pretty sure he knew why but he had to be sure so he needed to hear it from Kyle.

"I-I don't know I've just felt weird around you lately is all…" his words slowly getting quieter into a whisper as he blushed slightly.

That was it. It was exactly what Stan had thought Kyle thought he was gay and he wasn't so sure himself anymore but what's worse Kyle was uncomfortable around him now all cause he couldn't control himself.

"I see…well I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable...let's just work on the project." Stan turned his back to Kyle and began drawing rainbows on the poster around the word homosexuality he felt really gay right now but it was fat-ass's project and he was angry right now so he couldn't give a fuck.

Kyle just sat there worried had Stan realized he'd liked it? Did he hate him? What if he did how could Kyle go on without him? "Stan I didn't mean to upset you…I don't want this thing that happened to ruin our friendship…I mean we are still Super Best Friends right?" He was worried what if this changed how Stan felt?

"Of course Kyle! We'll always be Super Best Friends I promise"

Stan began to laugh at how stupid he'd been how could he forget this wasn't just any guy it was Ky his Ky and as gay as that sounded he should have known Kyle wouldn't care about his sexuality I mean honestly they were 9 anyway why did they have to worry about this kind of thing? Of course Stan knew the reason…This was South Park everything here was abnormal.

"Good!" Kyle heavily relieved he jumps at Stan Tackling him to the ground from behind with a hug.

"Kyle…uhh what are you doing?" Stan's heart was racing Kyle was laying against him now and his face was heating up.

"Oh sorry Stan I'm just really happy is all…" Way to go Kyle you just said you didn't wanna mess things up and you go and tackle Stan and tell him your happy he definitely must think your gay now.

"Oh well me too Ky I was afraid you wouldn't wanna be my friend anymore actually…" Stan smiled at Kyle while trying to hide his blush.

"What! How could you be so stupid? Nothing could stop me from being your friend!" Kyle said still laying across Stan's back.

"Really…?" Stan turned over so Kyle was hovering over him barely two inches away.

"…yea…" Kyle whisper slowly getting closer.

That is until the door burst open causing both boys to freeze in their respective postions.

"Hey fags…wow you really are fags aren't you!"

Cartman…of course only he could have ruined his moment with his Ky…wait what moment? Now he really sounded gay ugh he wanted to die.

"NO we aren't! Stan just bet me I couldn't take him down for 10 bucks and I being jewish couldn't pass up the money!" Kyle thought this has got to work playing on Cartmans prejudices is the only way to get out of this situation.

"Ah see well I can believe that now Kahl give me the 10 dollars for harming some of mah propertah!"

"First Stan isn't yours! Second he hasn't paid me yet…" Getting quiet after the first part.

"Don't worry Kahl I have no interest in your little boyfriend so don't get any sand in your vagina."

"Shut it fat-ass!" Stan yelled angrily he would have jumped up and throttled the fat little bastard if Kyle hadn't still been on top of him.

"Thank you Stan I was hoping you would say that! Now at my presentation tomorrow I'd like to have a demonstrat-_ion_! And now I've made up mah mind you and Kahl are gonna make out infront of the class.

"WHAT!?!" Kyle and Stan screamed in unison.

"I told you gahs you would pay for any disrespect towards mah authoritah! Now if Kahl would rather prove me right about him being a cheating jew whore that's just fine but I don't think he will." He smirked that little smile that he had that said I've got you by the balls and I know it.

Stan looked at Kyle an could see the indecision in his eyes. Looks like it was up to him…damn it.

"Fine we'll do it fat-ass! Now get the fuck out of my room we're still working in here!"

"Fine Stan I can see that having to show how much a fag he is has taken a greater affect on Kyle than I thought so I'll let that one go…I'll see you gahs tomorrow then." And with that he shuffled out of the room but not before throwing a twinkie wrapper in the trash.

"What a fat-ass!" Kyle said shakily getting up and not looking at Stan.

"Kyle don't worry whatever happens tomorrow we aren't going to let Cartman win right? And besides even if he does…we've still got each other right?" worried that this topic might cause the tension to reappear between them.

"R-right…" Kyle said unsure but turned and smiled at Stan. He wasn't so sure if Stan had noticed he'd liked the feeling of his hand on his ass…what if Kyle liked the kiss and got to into it? What if Stan noticed?

Stan had seemed confident but his thoughts were along the same lines. He'd been wondering what it would be like to kiss Kyle since their little incident the other day and now it was even stronger but what if it freaked Kyle out if he liked it…? He was pretty sure that would end whatever they had…

"So I guess we should finish the project…" Stan stated breaking from his thoughts.

"Yea but I think I'll finish mine at home…" Kyle got up and rushed out again. Déjà vu Stan thought god damn it Cartman you ruin everything…Stan finished the project and tried to fall asleep but couldn't stop picturing Kyle and himself locking lips in front of the whole class. A small part of him was afraid to do it but a much bigger part really wanted to…suddenly he didn't feel so good and rushed to the bathroom barely making it to the toilet before spewing his guts. That single act had cleared up all the doubts he had in his mind about how he'd been feeling it could after all mean only one thing.

He was completely gay for Kyle.

Woo chp4 it's longer than the others I hope you guys are liking it I know this story is gonna be short but it's just to see if I'm even capable of writing a good story soo yea…if you like it I'll make more if not then well I won't waste my time.


	5. Kenny and the Sixth sense

Chp5

Disclaimer- don't own south park

Stan woke up early on that judgment day. He'd have to kiss Kyle in front of the class…no not just kiss they'd have to make out tongue and all as he recalled Cartman clarifying for him on the phone last night and it had to last at least 15 seconds. This day could go one of two ways he and Kyle could fall in love and be together forever or Raven would be the one coming home from school…he much preferred the former.

"What am I supposed to do?" Stan asked himself out loud.

"What's wrong Stan?" Stan's dad stood in the doorway concerned.

"Oh hey dad thought you went to work already…well I have to do something embarrassing in front of the class today or Cartman will win and Kyle will be really humiliated by that…what do I do?" Being sure not to indicate any ideas at what it could be.

"Well what's more important to you? Your friend or not being embarrassed?" Just then he walked away something about being late.

Stan was surprised his dad had given such a serious answer that man was strange sometimes he could be the weirdest most perverted man on the planet and then sometimes he just made sense. When he thought about it Kyle was definitely more important than trying to avoid being embarrassed so as long as Kyle was ok with this he'd do it. And of course Kyle wasn't gonna give Cartman the satisfaction of backing out when that would be Cartman was right.

"Damn well at least I don't need to think about it anymore…"

At Kyle's house he was going through a similar train of thought today he was going to have an opportunity to kiss Stan his super best friend he was excited but also afraid what if Stan thought he was a freak after this? He looked in the mirror wondering what Stan would think of his hair he'd stopped at Bebe's house on the way home to ask her a favor knowing she'd do it for him. He hated his hair he'd had her cut a bit of it off and the straighten the rest so it was just barely longer than Stan's but it wasn't curly and that's all Kyle cared about.

"So today's the day I kiss Stan…might as well take care of that other thing first…" Putting his hat on tucking his hair in. He ran downstairs greeting everyone.

"Kyle! Your still here? Your gonna miss the bus!" His mom shrieked angrily.

"Don't worry mom I'm leaving I just wanted to show you something…" With that he whipped his hat off as his red hair fell around his face he could see his mom's jaw drop with the one eye not covered.

"Kyle Brovloski! What have you done to your hair! We need to fix it immediately!" his mother moved towards him.

"No mom! I like my hair better this way its more comfortable and more attractive so I'm keeping it!" he jumped towards the door opening it and about to close it but almost as an afterthought. "Oh and I love Stanley Marsh and I'm gonna kiss him in school today so deal with it!" He just stuck his tongue out and slammed the door leaving his parents and brothers jaws on the floor.

As he walked away from the house he was just praying he could be that confident later today when it really mattered…he knew he was gonna get nervous the moment he saw Stan it was just a given. He reached the bus stop first so he leaned up against the sign.

As Stan walked towards the bus stop with Cartman eating twinkies again…what a fat-ass…and Kenny reading probably some sort of porno (Kenny's first appearance.) "Hey guys who's that?" Stan asked pointing at the figure at their bus stop but none of them had an answer. "I don know dude looks like some new chick sweet!" Kenny replied. "Eww Kinny! That thing's a daywalker! That's gross!" Cartman said in his flamboyant ways. "Wait…it can't be…Kyle?!" Stan exclaimed as he got close enough for the person to hear they turned and sure enough it was Kyle.

"Oh hey guys…" Looking down

"Dude what happened to your hair?" Stan asked as the other two seemed to be surprised beyond words.

"Well I had Bebe straighten it last night and I kinda like it…how do I look Stan?" The others missed it but Kenny noticed that the question was only aimed at Stan and the look of sheer joy in the gingers eyes at Stan's answer. "It looks amazing dude! You should definitely keep it that way" Kenny just smiled as he slipped his hood back on and edged over to the far side of Kyle and whispered "So when are you gonna tell him?" Smiling slyly to himself.

"What?!" Kyle whispered worried. Had Kenny really caught on?

"You didn't just decide to straighten your hair you did it for Stan didn't you?" Kenny smiled as he saw the gingers eyes widen he'd hit it right on.

"How do you know these things?!" Kyle whispered again surprised.

"I don know honestly maybe it's cause I die all the time got some kinda sixth sense or some shit ya know?"

"What are you gahs talkin about? Kinny don't bother mah property you poor bastard!"

Kyle turned and looked towards Stan who was being very quiet and found out he was staring…at Kyle.

"Stan something wrong? I mean does my hair look stupid?" Worried he looked terrible or something worse.

"Oh it's no I really love it!" Love!?! Why did he use that word? Was he trying to freak Kyle out.

"Oh thanks!" the ginger just smiled and turned away to hide his blush he'd been correct in thinking Stan prefers straight hair.

Just then the bus pulled up. But Cartman blocked the doorway. "Don't think for an instant that you gahs can get out of this! You are gonna do what we agreed upon last night!"

"It wasn't much of an agreement…but don't worry we don't plan on letting you have the last laugh we don't go back on our word unlike some people…"

Cartman just smiled oh he was definitely going to get the last laugh he had this planned out for far to long. They began boarding the bus Cartman then Kyle then Stan and finally Kenny who not paying attention had stepped out into traffic leading to another infamous death but at least he was going to get to school as the car had splattered him all over the side of the bus.

"Oh my god they killed Kenny!" Stan gasped.

"You bastard!" Kyle yelled as a finish.

Poor Kenny so much for that sixth sense.

Woo gotta get Kenny in there sometime he'll play a much better part in my next story which hasn't quite fit completely yet I might have the first chapter up later tonight or tomorrow not sure yet. So yea the more reviews I get the faster I update though I'm pretty quick anyway.


	6. Demonstrations and Support

Chp6

Disclaimer- I don own none of this I don even own any grammar XD

As the bus pulled up to the school Kenny appeared on the sidewalk in front of the school hands in his pockets with a bored expression on his face. "Wow Kenny that was fast!" Kyle exclaimed. Yea well there was no way I was missing first period. "What why?" Stan asked raising an eyebrow. "Well Cartman told me that his presentation was gonna blow my fucking perverted mind!" Kenny yelled getting excited like a kid at Christmas. "Jesus Kinny quiet your poor ass down!" Cartman shuffled passed them throwing a bag of chips into the trash. (hah not twinkies this time) "Fat-ass…" they all mumbled together and began laughing.

Stan and Kyle were approaching their lockers when they noticed a certain pissed off girl waiting for them. "Oh Jesus here we go Stan you ready to fight the banshee?" Kyle joked. "I think so I got my trusted squire to talk to her for me after all!" He said smiling evily. "Yea…Wait what?!" Stan grabbed Kyle and pushed him in front like a human shield.

"STAN!" Wendy said happily. Well this was weird she had a look that could kill but she was happy…wtf?

"Uh hi Wendy what can I do ya for?" Stan said resting his chin over Kyle's shoulder to show as little of himself as possible.

"Oh I was just thinking about you and how wonderful you are…" Oh so that was it she wanted to get back together.

"Well Wendy I uh…" Stan stumbled normally he'd be over joyed about this but he didn't want to be with Wendy anymore he couldn't even remember why he had in the first place.

"Well what?!" She said a bit to forcefully and sharply showing she was definitely still mad.

"Well Wendy just that he's interested in someone else sorry girl but you missed your chance!" Kyle said quickly he was pretty sure she would eventually hurt Stan again if they went out again but he was gonna prevent that if it killed him…and with the look on her face it just might.

"WHAT!?!" she screeched…yup definitely a banshee "How dare you move on so quickly! I bet you were cheating on me before weren't you!"

Stan was quiet for a moment technically he had been with the person he now liked while going out with Wendy so in a way she was right. "Yea I guess in a way I probably was I'm sorry about that Wendy…"

"Your sorry!?! No your not! But you will be mark my words Stan Marsh you will regret cheating on WENDY TESTABURGER!" and with that she stomped off leaving a wake of bruised and battered 3rd and 2nd graders in her wake.

"Jesus Christ what is her problem…and who is this other person you're interested in?" Kyle asked.

"What do you think her problem is? She's a bitch she'll just go find Token and forget about it…and you're the one who said I was interested in someone else I just went along with it." Stan said calmly hell yes he finally did something right.

"Oh…I see" Kyle said disappointedly.

Stan suddenly took back what he'd thought he'd just made Kyle sad for some reason god damn it he should have known he'd say the wrong thing.

"I mean there is this one person I like…" He said quickly almost in a whisper.

Kyle's eyes widened. "Really? Who?" he asked anxiously.

"Well aren't you nosey well I'll tell you after school ok?" Stan said just as the warning bell to head to class went off. Both boys paled first period was Cartman's presentation…

Mr. Garrison took attendance and then began calling up people for their presentations both Stan and Kyle went one after another glad to have that out of the way. Of course Cartman had asked to go last since his was going to be "The biggest thing the class had ever seen".

"Well thank you Clyde now let's get a presentation from someone who's not a complete retard (get the reference? :D) let's see who's left…" Of course Stan and Kyle had been paying close attention to the people who had gone and only one person was left… "Eric your turn get up here and give your presentation on fags."

"Of course Mr. Garrison I believe we will all learn some things today that we didn't know before…" Cartman smirked at Stan and Kyle at this last part and began his presentation.

Cartman's presentation had gone on for 5 minutes and showed no sign of nearing the end when Kyle wrote a note to Stan and quickly flicked it at him. _**Do you think he was serious about making out…?**_ To which Stan replied_**Of course dude it is CARTMAN anyway don't worry I know you won't back out so neither will i**__. _Kyle was glad at least Stan wasn't going to abandon him. _**But are you ok with making out with me? I mean have you even done that with Wendy**__?_ Stan quickly replied _**no I've never made out before and I would much rather it be you than the wicked bitch she might bite my tongue off or something…haha**_ Kyle laughed at this and concidering her mood he wouldn't put something like that passed Wendy.

"Stan Kyle! Are you passing notes?" Mr. Garrison yelled.

"No Mr. Garrison" both boys droned.

"This just proves mah point Mr. Garrison fags i.e. Stan and Kyle are disruptive and just plain disgusting and as such they have agreed to demonstrate just how gross fags are! Well get up here you two." Cartman motioned for them to come up and stand next to him.

"W-what are they going to demonstrate exactly E-eric?" Butters asked nervously.

"Well I'm glad you asked Butters why don't I let the jew tell you since he's so excited about it."

Kyle shot him a glare that said as soon as this bet is over you are going to be castrated and mailed to Nambla (the ones in jail) hidden inside of a cake. "Well butters…ahem…we are uh…" Kyle was getting too nervous he couldn't take everyone looking at him so he turned towards Stan. "Uh…Stan…"

Stan was getting nervous and he knew that if he heard Kyle say It to the class he'd lose his nerve so he just grabbed Kyle and pressed his lips hard against the little jew's and slid his hands down to his waste.

Cartman started a stop watch the kiss had to last at least 15 seconds.

3 seconds in everyone was gasping

Kyle had slid his hands up a around Stan's neck.

7 Seconds in Kenny was cheering "Get some stan!"

Cartman was smirking taking a picture for blackmail later on to be shown to the parents who he figured would be upset by this.

12 seconds in almost done.

Stan had slipped his tongue against Kyle's lips who allowed him to enter it.

15 seconds time was up.

"Ok gah's you did it 15 seconds now everyone wasn't that gross?" Cartman had walked in front of the couple to get the classes attention again.

"What are they doing now oh god!?" Tweek asked.

20 seconds in…

And Stan had Kyle pressed against the chalk board.

"uh Gahs you can stop trying to stick your tongues down each others throats…"

"STAN KYLE!" Mr. Garrison said yelling pulling them apart. "I will not tolerate faggy behavior in my class room!"

"Stan i…i…" Kyle stuttered looking like he was about to cry when he realized Stan definitely had noticed how into it he was and then he ran just ran as fast as he could to get out of the room.

"Ky wait…" Stan wanted to follow but he thought that this was his fault and just dropped his head in defeat.

"Stan what are you doing! Go after him!" Kenny yelled.

"Stan he's right go!" Wendy said without a hint of anger.

"Hay! Are you gahs forgetting that they are fags?" Everyone just ignored Cartman.

"Kenny…Wendy what are you…?" Stan asked confused.

"Stan…I really like you and I was pissed you liked another girl but it was Kyle wasn't it…the other person you liked?" She asked sounding slightly defeated.

"Yea…" Stan replied quietly.

"Of course it was! They've been practically dating since they were 5 if you really think about it I mean they sneak into each others rooms when they are grounded!" Kenny added.

"Well then I can't be mad that I lost to love no one can beat that!" Wendy smiled.

"Wow Wendy uh…thanks?...i think…" just then Stan remembered what he should be doing. "Mr. Garrison can I go after Kyle?"

"Well I don't know Stan did you ask Mr. Hat?"

"Oh not this again…look Mr. Garrison…"

"DID you ASK Mr. Hat?"

Stan sighed. "Mr. Hat may I PLEASE go after Kyle?"

"Well Stan…NO you go to hell! You go to hell and you die!" Mr. Hat/Garrison responded like the ass he is.

"Well you know what Mr. Garrison…" With that Stan took up Craig's favorite Hand sign "…FUCK YOU!" then he ran out after Kyle figuring he knew where he was going since he definitely wasn't in the school building anymore.

"What that hell is goin on heya?! Those two are fags and all of you ass wholes are just gonna cheer them on?" Cartman shouted at the class.

"SHUT UP FAT-ASS!!!!" the entire class shouted. Cartman then shuffled back to his desk but not before throwing a twinkie wrapper in the trash.

What a fat-ass…

He was here and from the look of things so was Kyle as one of his gloves was on the ground at the base of the tree. Stan looked up at the tree house that he and Kyle had made earlier that year together guess it makes sense something like this should end here…almost like a cleverly written fanfic ;)

"Kyle you there…?" Stan called up.

"Stan…?" Was all the reply he needed he quickly climbed up finding Kyle curled up in a corner crying and shiver from having soaked himself in tears.

"Dude are you ok…?" was all he could think to ask.

"Do I LOOK like I'm ok!?! I just made out with my bestfriend in the 4th grade we both happen to be guys and I LIKED IT! NO I'm not ok!"

Stan just sat there stunned.

Srry that's it for now :P hate me all you want but you know you love it! Review I draw my effort from them I got a bunch so I made a really long chapter :D lots of stuff happened and more Kenny srry all you fans of him he'll be in the next story big time I promise.


	7. Clubhouses and Schools

Chp7

Disclaimer- Don't own the characters

Stan just sat there brain not working…again…Kyle liked him…and he liked Kyle…it just seemed like he was missing something there had to be some kind of key point or something…

"Stan…?" Kyle asked choking back tears afraid he'd just freaked Stan out. "You hate me now don't you…?" He put his head down.

"Hate you?!" Stan said quickly. "No Ky! I l…lo-lo…lov…" but that was as far as he got before he had to run to the edge of the tree house and spew his guts all over the ground bellow.

"Do I gross you out that much…?" About to cry more.

"Kyle that's not from disgust…you know I throw up around people I like…got a weak stomach can't help it…" Looked away embarrassed about how he told Kyle but it was true.

"Wait…you…" Kyle's eyes went wide when he realized what Stan was saying. "You mean you like me…? But you like Wendy…?"

"How could i? She breaks my heart every other day but you're the one who always puts it back together…Ky…I think I really like you…"

"You know that would make us gay right?" Kyle asked still not sure if he was dreaming or not.

"Eh maybe but I mean look at my dad I'm lucky I'm as normal as I am considering I'm from his family and besides…you're my best friend and this just means we'll get to spend more time together right?"

"Yea I guess…but Stan about making out…well uh…" Kyle didn't wanna say the wrong thing.

"We weren't ready for it…we should wait a while before we do anything even kiss just knowing that we like each other is enough till were older right?" Stan finished for him.

"Huh…?" Kyle asked even though that is what he was getting at.

"Don't worry Kyle I feel the same way we're only in 4th grade (im pretty sure they should be in 3rd at this time but I already said 4th in earlier chapters so deal with it!) kids don't start doing that sorta stuff till at least middle school…but ya know we have to thank Cartman now right?"

"What why?!? Why should I thank that fat-ass bastard!" Kyle fumed.

Stan just scooted next to him and entwined their fingers. "First Kyle calling him fat and a bastard aren't really effective insults even though both are completely true…second because if it hadn't been for him we wouldn't be here right now…"

"God damn it…I'm done with his little slave thing…" Kyle said looking straight ahead.

"Even though Cartman will have something to use against you now?" Stan asked raising an eyebrow.

"What does it matter…I told my parents already that I liked you and that we were gonna kiss…so I don't think Cartman can do any worse than my mom will…plus who would really listen to Cartman anyway?"

"True and I don't know how I'm gonna tell my dad but my mom will probably be happy I think she always wanted me to be a girl cause of how shelly turned out…"

"So back to school then? We'll just make it but at least we can how everyone we're together so they can get over it over night ya know?"

"Yea makes sense…well lets go."

When they reached the school hands still intertwined the other kids were just rushing out the building most staring or pointing as they passed. Then there was their class…Wendy and Kenny were talking as they exited the building but stopped when they saw the couple. "Woohoo!" Kenny exclaimed in his trademark way. "Congratulations Stan" Wendy said as she walked of with Kenny…wait with Kenny? Hmm go Kenny…The two received many compliments and congratulations but then Hitler in American form stepped out of the school angry and pointing dramatically.

"You gah's are still mah slaves and as such you two are not to see each other for the rest of your servitude and since I got a failing grade on the project that is extended another month!" Cartman yelled as he shoved a twinkie into his face.

"Umm how about no?" Stan said.

"Oh well then I guess the Jew will have to suffer alone just like he deserves…"

"No I'm done too fat-ass but thanks for getting me and Stan together that's probably the only good thing you've ever done for us!"

"What you can't back out you fucking jew!" Cartman yelled running at him but Stan grabbed Cartman and tripped him onto his fat-ass.

"Don't touch my Kyle!" Stan said standing defensively in front of Kyle.

"I hate you guys and you know what screw you fags I'm goin home!" He said in his dramatic fashion and threw his twinkie wrapper into the trash.

What a fat-ass…

The end? Or is it!?! Don't worry 1 more chp coming you should like it! It will be up shortly maybe tonight.


	8. Druken Dads and Virgins

Chp8

It has been 4 years since they began to realize their feelings were more than just those of friends. Not much had changed Cartman was still fat, Kenny still died all the time but he was dating Wendy when ever he was alive so his life improved…sorta considering he was maimed and murdered daily, Kyle straightened his hair everyday and had grown about half a foot while Stan had grown a whole foot and three letting him tower over the jew just the way he liked it he'd also grown his hair longer though not as long as Kyle's which now reached his back.

"I can't believe another person thought I was your _girlfriend_!" Kyle fumed.

"Well you do kinda look girly sometimes…and you like chick flicks and stuff…and wait what would be wrong with being my girlfriend?" Stan asked him confused as to why that had bothered him.

"Well I don't know it's just annoying being mistaken for a girl…maybe I should stop dressing this way then…." It was true he wore a really baggy sweatshirt (orange of course :P) while he had really tight jeans and just plain white shoes since he liked to draw on them and with how thin his diabetic frame was and the inability to see the chest it would be easy to confuse him for a girl…

"No!" Stan hugged him from behind kissing the side of his neck. "I like my Ky just the way he is, isn't that enough?"

Kyle just looked at him then smiled. "Yea that's all that really matters."

Wendy was walking on the other side of the street alone when suddenly Kenny faded into existence next to her. "Hey sexy!" Kenny had ditch the hooded jacket for a simple tattered orange sweatshirt and torn jeans. "Oh hey hun your back even faster this time Satan must really be getting tired of you." Most people would think this conversation was weird but considering death was an everyday thing for everyone who knew Kenny it was kinda like eh whatever… "Yea probably but I'm glad that means we have more time" Kenny said stepping out into the street…and getting splattered by a passing semi

"Oh my god they killed Kenny!" Stan exclaimed.

"You bastards!" Kyle screamed in his angry girlish voice.

"Watch your mouth young lady!" a random old guy said as he passed and Stan had to use all his strength to hold Kyle back from ripping out his throat. Wendy just watched from the other side of the street hardly even phased.

"So much for extra time…Oh god damn it Kenny you got blood on my shoes again!" With that she walked off not even waiting for the clean up crew.

2 years later they had grown again Stan another 7 inches reaching 5'10 while Kyle still was only 4'8 due to his diabetes. They were on their way to a party with everyone from their old class.

"Why am I sooo short?" Kyle whinned cutely.

"Why does it matter I think it's cute. Just like everything else about you." Stan said without even looking down at the ginger drama to his left.

"You wouldn't think it was cute if it was you!" Kyle said crossing his arms convinced he'd made his point.

"Well I'm not short you are so that's besides the point I don't see why you care so much…" Stan said used to these rants by now.

"Guys aren't supposed to be short! Even Cartman hit 5'4!" Kyle whined again.

"Well it's probably because you're so feminine and such a bottom that your body just decided "Lets be cute" and thus you are short and girlish and that is my two cents." Stan said jokingly.

Kyle just glared at him but as they approached the house he got a strange look on his face.

"What?" Stan asked not looking in the direction of Token's house where the party would be as he was walking backwards so he could face Kyle.

"Umm is that your dad…?" Kyle pointed behind stan.

"WOOOOHHH party! Hey Stan STAN! It's a party!" Stan's dad was completely wasted dancing on a car outside Token's house in his underwear.

"Awww aawwwww!" He pinched the bridge of his nose just as he did whenever he had to deal with stupid people.

Stan decided to just let his dad tire himself out and get him home later as they reached the door Kyle knocked lightly barely making a sound…no answer… "Here let me show you how a real man does it!" taking on a sarcastic and southern accent then pounding on the door so hard it would have broken if it hadn't been the best money could buy.

"Hey guys what did my door ever do to you?" Token asked as he swung it open.

"Well it go in my way and hurt Kyle's hand."

Kyle blushed and hid his bruised hand behind his back trying to brush it off.

"Dude Stan you're here!" Kenny called running up and giving him a hi-five. Kenny and Stan had become best friends since Kyle had taken up his spot as boyfriend and in turn Kyle and Wendy had become bestfriends because of common interests but Kenny and Wendy would never even scratch the surface of how close Stan and Kyle had been before becoming a couple but it was nice having kicked the fat-ass out of their group when Kenny started dating Wendy.

"Yea man is the fat-ass here? I was expecting to have some insults thrown my way by now."

"Yea he and Butters are probably sucking each others faces off."Kenny said in his perverted way.

And it was commonly believed that Cartman and Butters were together as they had started hanging out a few years back and Cartman seemed to treat him a lot better than anyone else so people just assumed they were doing each other.

"Ay! Don't compare me to those fags unlike them I have self control!" Self control hah that was funny for someone who had remained fat without so much as an attempt at a diet. Wait…Cartman was holding Butters hand…

"You guys totally are banging each other!" Kenny yelled then walked around collecting 10 bucks from everyone in the room as he had bet against them all in favor of the couple.

"Only once or t-twice Kenny…" Butters mumbled in his black hello kitty shirt and messy shoulder length hair. Six years later and Butters still had no shame but everyone respected that about him. But everyone in the room as just wide eyed at Butters statement.

"You mean you a-and Cartman actually fucked…?" Kyle asked not wanting to believe the fat-ass had lost his virginity before him or even at all.

"Well sure Kyle!" Butters said smiling the whole time.

"Get some Cartman!" Kenny Yelled again receiving a slap from Wendy.

"So Kahl how many times have you fags done it?" Cartman asked and all eyes turned towards them.

"Well we havn't actually…ya know done it…" Stan mumbled.

"HOW!?!" Everyone in the room yelled at the same time.

"You guys have been going out for like 6 years your 15 for Christ sakes and you're both guys how has there been nothing?" Kenny asked in disbelief.

"Well unlike some guys Stan is respectful of his partners feelings so he left it up to me a while back and just enjoys being with me so we just never really had the urge I guess…" Kyle answered him.

"Well that you gahs is unacceptable!" Cartman yelled. "Ay Kinny help me drag these two upstairs to the guestroom!" With that he grabbed Kyle easily hoisting him over his shoulder while Kenny an even match with Stan just kept him back from getting to Cartman allowing him to follow on his own.

"Get in there jew!" Cartman threw Kyle into the room onto the bed causing him to yelp suddenly.

"Kyle!" Stan ran in to make sure he was ok but just as he reached the bed he heard a slam and click.

"They didn't…" Kyle said hanging off the bed upside down looking at the door.

Stan went to it to try opening it. "Yea they did…"

"Maybe we should just humor them then…?" Kyle said seductively now on all fours on the bed pawing the air towards Stan. "_Mrow!" _

Stan walked slowly towards Kyle in a daze. "Really…?"

Kyle's face suddenly went completely serious "No not really."

Stan's eyes went wide. "TEASE!!!" Tackling him and began tickling and nipping at him playfully.

Well I just couldn't end this one yet so got at least 1 more chapter left lucky you! I havn't decided if I should have some smut in the next chapter give me your opinions either way it'll help me decide.


	9. Nights to remember and Porn

Chp 9

Disclaimer- I don't own south park yup…

Srry in advance to anyone expecting smut I thought about it but I decided to just keep it light since this the first story I've written…well written and put on here…yup my first chapter of the next story should be up tonight check it out and let me know wat chu think! :3

They hadn't planned on it but I guess the combination of not being allowed out of the room and the fact that Stan knew exactly where Kyle liked being touched and kissed and once he'd melted onto the bed with that cute lusty look they Stan just lost it…now they were laying on the bed waiting for everyone outside to wake up because it had gone quiet and when they tried to call for someone no one answered.

"You know if there was a fire right now we would be so dead…" Kyle said laughing.

"Death that's such a good topic for right after sex nice one Ky." Stan said laughing as well.

"So when do you think they'll let us out?" Kyle asked yawning.

"Probably in the morning most likely with the amount of beer I saw before we came upstairs they passed out probably soon after locking us in here…" Stan said eyes closed.

"Well this isn't a bad way to spend the night…way better than a party anyway just snuggling with my boyfriend" Kyle said with that cute smile as he clung to Stan's side with his head on the larger boys chest.

Without opening his eyes Stan smiled. "Your such a girl…"

"Well that's fine as long as I'm Stan's girl" Kyle said seductively again kissing Stan's chest and moving down.

Tonight was gonna be one to remember…(you thought I was gonna put some in anyway! Hahah sucks to be you! :p)

They were back in the position of Kyle's smaller body clinging to Stan's side as he had his right arm around the little jew sleeping. Of course that was only until they heard the loud crinkling of a bag of chips and then someone yelling "Shhh fat-ass keep it down!" someone else said quietly "Hun you aren't being very quiet either…" then a very annoying voice not even trying to be quiet. "Ay I'm not fat I'm big boned!" still another voice laughing. "Ugh dude only Butters needs to know that!" Then the whole room erupted to laughter and the two of them bolted upright finally shaken from their peaceful slumber.

"Umm hi…" Kenny said.

"What are you guys doing in h…" he stopped midsentence looking around at cameras in everyone's hands and Kenny collecting money once again.

"WTF! Why are you taking pictures you pervs!" Kyle screamed in his girlish voice.

"Dude they aren't for us!" Token said quickly. "But they will fetch a good price on the internet…and some girls at school…and Kenny will probably keep a few…"

"I would never…!" he began but just then a photo slipped out of the sleeve of his sweatshirt...everyone looked at him with knowing glances. "Well maybe just one…" he ducked the swing from Wendy.

"Ay did you fags actually do it? Or just be little pussies and hug all night?" it was funny how Cartman still called them fags when he was gay himself.

"If you really need to know yes we did it…several times…" Stan said whispering the last part.

Kyle blushed and hid his face in Stan's chest.

"Woo get some!" Kenny yelled ignoring the beating from his girlfriend.

"Several…? How many times exactly…" Bebe asked.

"Uh idk I lost count honestly..." Stan said absent mindedly. "5…maybe 6?"

"7 hun remember we…after I woke up and…" Turning red again.

"7 times?!" Clyde said.

"Dude…that's amazing I bet Kenny can't even do it that many times in 6 hours…" Token said.

"What? Is that a challenge?" Kenny said grinning grabbing Wendy close.

"Y-you know it's not that surprising…I mean gosh guys they been holding back for 6 years that's gotta build up on a person r-right?" Butters said from behind Cartman trying to avoid looking towards Kyle and Stan.

They all thought about it and for once Butters made a good point.

"Well Stan doesn't have to worry about that anymore now does he Kyle?" Kenny said laughing.

"Eh Stan had Kyle tamed when they were 7 he's definitely the bitch in the relationship…" Cartman said in a matter of fact tone.

Kyle just smiled evily. "Yea but I'm Stan's bitch." He started trailing kisses down Stan's neck to his chest.

"Holy shit dude we're still in the room!" Clyde said running from the room.

"Hey Token?" Craig asked.

"What…?" shaken from his stunned expression seeing Craig grinning.

"Think Tweak and I could use the other guest room for a bit?" He said grabbing Tweek's ass.

"Ngh! Craig too much pressure! P-people are gonna kill me now arg!" Tweak began to freak out…what else is new?

"Maybe Tweak so we should go hide in the other guest room!" he said pulling the boy along and locking the door behind them.

"Dude! The agreement was just Stan and Kyle! It's bad enough I caught Cartman and Butters in the fucking basement!" Token said walking downstairs wondering when his house turned into a fucking porno…he shuddered remembering a certain quest he'd undertaken when he was Tarangar the Black…

"Hey Token am I pretty?" Someone asked. He turned around and saw Bebe.

"Uh yea of course why?" She could get any guy in school she wasn't a slut though her clothes said otherwise…

She smirked. "Prove it…" She said pushing him backwards into his dads empty study closing the door. Just as he was thinking...

This was one bad ass party…

Well that's it srry Clyde fans I didn't pair him with anyone but honestly…I don't really like Clyde he's just kinda…there…yea…so now I'll work on the other story which WONT be connected but might be similar in some ways :P


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